What Annoys You?

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If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished? ~ Rumi

We all have them ... those irritating annoyances that seem to surround us. They come at us from everywhere: people, pets, gadgets, even the weather.  And they are widespread: gum-snapping, loud chewing, loud talkers, traffic snarls, incessant barking, phones going off at inappropriate times, windy tee boxes, long lines, fitted sheets that don’t fit, I could go on and on.

Although we would love to eliminate these from our daily life, it won’t happen.  We will always have relatives, friends, and acquaintances who have habits we don’t like.  The weather is, well, the weather – no controlling it.  Our pets can be trained, but our neighbors may not behave to our liking.  Our gadgets will randomly act up in ways we’ve never seen before, despite (or because of) our interaction with them.  No matter how good we are at controlling our environment, there will always be people and factors we can’t control.

So, how do we handle those irritants that annoy us?  We can be frustrated, angry, and combative or learn to respond more healthily.  Isn’t being centered and calm in an annoying environment much more impressive than when everything is to our liking?

It takes practice to handle those annoying situations gracefully.  And how we respond can set the tone for the rest of the day.  It certainly does us no good to carry an annoyance on our backs, amplifying other irritants that might crop up along the way.  If we give the annoyance more weight than it deserves, we might miss the important aspects of the situation.  We could overlook the intent of the conversation.  We could miss the good things while focusing too much on the bad.

Irritations and annoyances can be invaluable teachers as we continue on our journey of self-discovery and improvement.  The irritant may be a trigger point for you and your past experiences. A little self-inspection of why something bothers you can go a long way towards relieving the pain of the annoyance for the future.

It is more about how we respond to irritants.  How about taking a deep breath and letting the irritant slip past us?  Can we let them go and respond more positively?  Let's hit the pause button before reacting rather than allowing the aggravation to ruin the moment for us and others.

Be calm; count to three. Put the annoyance into perspective. Understand the person or thing irritating you. They most likely are not doing it to cause you grief or hurt. Can you view the situation from their viewpoint? If so, it might help calm your reaction.

Look at the annoyance from another angle.  I’m sure there could be a positive side that you could focus on, like how delicious the dinner was, even if the waiter was slow in bringing the check.  Or that the phone ringing at the theater happened during the previews, not the movie.  Maybe there is something you can do differently or change your expectations about an annoyance.  Is it something you can fix?

The more we practice handling annoyances gracefully, the less they will bother us.  Our tolerance will expand, as will our patience and acceptance.  When we choose not to react to irritants, we will take another step in our self-development and spiritual growth.  I know all too well that our lives provide ample opportunities to develop these better qualities with lots of practice! 

What do you find annoys you the most?  Why do you think it does?  How can you change your reaction to it?

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